FILM in PEACE

Film when you are at peace. 

Sometimes we fight so long for art, we forget to relax and enjoy it. Every time I direct a bigger project there is a stress that lingers everywhere. Many times people will ask how I am doing in the middle of it and I'm always confused. 

Strangely enough me looking stressed is me having the time of my life. I like to work. Long hard hours of constant problem solving and running around. When you love something you don't mind the work. I unfortunately inherited the stress look from my father. I remember when he come home from a long day at work, you would hear only about a slew of problems and the people that irritated him that day.  I didn't realize till I got older, his negative language was him expressing how much he loved his job. The negativity was just the reality of the situation, but it wasn't something bad necessarily. 

Think of it this way. You point out all the problems, the negative events and people. Now after the day is done and you sit back and revisit the list you can say you overcame that. That is where the positive is. If my father came home and barely talked about his day, it probably was a bad day. 

Though this is how my kind of work day pans out too, most people don't understand that. They think all the negative was a sign of a bad day. I never said I learned effective communication from my parents. So usually when my 15-30 minute rant is over I have to end with, "But I love what I did today." You have to also remind yourself it was good after pointing out the problems.

This one shoot, in the picture above, was one of the few shoots that I felt at peace.

Also this shoot was constantly falling apart in the preparation process and I just kept going because I needed to get it done. It was also my fault it kept not working out, and I was close to canceling almost every three hours for a week. Needless to say, I definitely dreaded shooting it.

Then I walked into the doors of this lovely couples house and somehow all that stress went away. I quietly set up lights and checked the camera and texted actors in the most unbelievable peace. It was like living in a warm glow. This reminded me that filmmaking doesn't always have to be a struggle, but should also be enjoyed.